FORGIVENESS PRACTICE: Breathing-in & Breathing-out feelings and thoughts as a way to heal and live

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FORGIVING PRACTICE. Hallelujah for the practice of forgiveness for its healing powers and as a way of guiding one's words and deeds. (art by Hallelujah Truth, aka Ruth Schowalter)

Hallelujah for FORGIVENESS…hallelujah for finding out how fabulously vast this human act of “cancelling” what occurred IS!

Dear readers, I believe it is possible to change ourselves right down to our cellular level through repeated acts of FORGIVENESS.

As a novice at this practice of asking for FORGIVENESS and accepting apologies, I feel slightly presumptuous writing about it. However, I’m well into my second year of practicing FORGIVENESS every day.

HALLELUJAH TRUTH ASKING FOR FORGIVENESS.

Each day, I breathe in and exhale four times to apologize to someone I feel or know that I have harmed:

Breathe-in-Breathe-out (BIBO): “___________, I’m sorry I made you suffer. 
BIBO: Please forgive me.
BIBO: I love you.
BIBO: I thank you.

Even though this FORGIVENESS practice is done in the privacy of my home or mind, I have discovered several things occurring as a result. 

First, the “energy” of a harmful act or hurt relationship is gently nudged and moves. Instead of staying static—immoveable—the negative energy of the thought "pulses," creating the possibility of change and possible release of that thought or feeling.

Second, through this daily FORGIVENESS practice, I am also now more likely to ask someone for forgiveness face-to-face, ready to acknowledge my wrong doing or being the catalyst of a negative reaction. I have cultivated a ready path to the act of apologizing and developed a “forgiveness” vocabulary. 

And, third, slowly, I have come to realize that I am learning to forgive myself for all that I fail to do, all that I don’t execute correctly, for all that I fall short of in my expectations.

DAILY PRACTICE OF FORGIVENESS

FORGIVENESS is a possible WAY of living my life more fully, richly, and deeply. 

I pause now reflecting more than ever before if my word or deed will hurt someone. "How can I phrase my thought or perform an action that causes the least harm?" is something I might remember to ask myself now. Living my life much more consciously is a result of this FORGIVENESS practice.

…STILL…I hunger for a deeper way of knowing about FORGIVENESS, how to forgive, and how to be forgiven. I suspect that this pathway of forgiveness will lead me to new behaviors—manifesting new ways of supporting and playing with myself and my friends. Perhaps, forgiveness will show me a sweeter way of being human and accepting my humanity.

FORGIVENESS BRINGS US INTO DEPTH OF OUR BEINGS

The other day (June 23, 2015), I was fortunate enough to meet with an elder in my community who has deep experience in leading FORGIVENESS workshops, and he introduced me to a five-step forgiveness practice. He skillfully guided me through the steps that were profound for me in their simplicity. I hope to learn this five-step process and to have the opportunity to implement it as a regular practice in my life.

That's Coffee With Hallelujah! SOUL BLOG with me and share what you know about FORGIVENESS.

FORGIVENESS: Embodying an act of compassion for the self and others

CONSTRUCTION OF FORGIVENESS. Let's imagine constructing forgiveness can be a creative act, like assimilating the statues of the four seasons here at the Atlanta Botanical Garden. (photo by Hallelujah Truth)

Hallelujah for the ability to shift our emotions, to leave the negative and embrace the good of which so much exists on this beautiful Earth. Hallelujah for the act of FORGIVENESS--forgiving ourselves and others!

The "idea" of FORGIVENESS is elusive. As a mental construct, we understand how useful it is to transform the hurt and anger that we feel as a victim of an unkind act.

SEASONAL FORGIVENESS. What does this image of winter summon for you when thinking of forgiveness? Do our emotions mirror the seasons? Are there times when feelings "die" and "retreat" for a period of rest, just like plants in nature? (photo by Hallelujah Truth)

Just like a garden, I believe our emotional terrains need tending, mending, and rest. FORGIVENESS is a wonderful garden tool to implement in this process. I have been exploring the topic of FORGIVENESS with my friend Cecelia Kane in our curriculum, "A Year to Live." In Piero Ferrucci's book, The Power of Kindness, his chapter on FORGIVENESS begins with a question to a survivor of the Holocaust: "What is the important thing in life?"

The survivor's answer? FORGIVENESS! But what is FORGIVENESS? It is the process of closing out the PAST and living in the PRESENT. And yes, releasing the negative emotions from the body spirit, the entire self, and finding peace.

WHAT IS FORGIVENESS? FORGIVENESS is an irrational act because accounts don't balance if you try to reason yourself into FORGIVENESS. The pieces don't add up. (photo by Hallelujah Truth)

FORGIVENESS is an act of spirit, faith, hope and generosity. To release resentment is a step toward one's total health--emotions, intellect, spirit, and body. But to release that resentment, each one of us, first, must be willing to fully embrace the damage done. The anger needs to be expressed, explains Ferrucci, and then it might be possible to empathize with the person who has harmed us. Really? Yes.

FORGIVENESS CAUSES RADICAL TRANSFORMATION. To be able to see from another person's perspective--the one who harmed us--allows us to relinquish judgement and to embrace compassion. Our compassion transforms hurt, resentment, and anger into something new and brings us into the PRESENT. The PAST is completed. Released. Over. (photo by Hallelujah Truth)

EMPATHIZING with the offender allows us to practice flexibility and humility--that is a radical change from anger and resentment! We become present to the NOW. We become the the FORGIVENESS! What a magical action compassion is! We embody it for ourself and others.

WE BECOME THE FORGIVENESS. I am so thankful for the four seasons which provide a symbolic way of understanding ourselves. In order to be healthy, whole, and healed--to flourish and bloom--we need to tend to the garden of our souls. What of your emotional past is ready to be forgiven? (photo by Hallelujah Truth)

ABOUT THE SCULPTURES. Philip Hass, an American artist and filmmaker, designed these sculptures. He was strongly influenced by Renaissance artist Giuseppe Arcimboldo’s paintings. To read more about these sculptures go here. (photo by Hallelujah Truth)

That's Coffee With Hallelujah! SOUL BLOG with me about FORGIVENESS. How do you let go of the anger, the sense of injustice, the hurt that you experience?

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS: Immense gratitude goes to Cecelia Kane, with whom I am in the sixth month of a 12-month curriculum we call "A Year to Live." We have been meeting since December on almost every Monday to discuss readings from various texts (A Year to Live by Stephen Levine; Making Friends with Death by Judith Lief, and Dying Well by Ira Byock to name a few). One of our topics to discuss in the month of April was FORGIVENESS. 

I also want to thank Angela Bennett and her Goddesspell workshop on March 30, 2014. The afternoon was rich with meditations and reflections on forgiveness facilitated by Anahata Iradah. 

Then there are the forms of InterPlay! I am so grateful for the way in which InterPlay offers movement, story telling, and voice as a way to embody such complex ideas as FORGIVENESS.