REVERB15 (Days 14 & 15) Pleasurable transformation through dance and visual art

TRANSFORMATION 2015. The top figure is how the Protector first appeared to me in my drawings. Hallelujah (me) is reclining at her feet and made vulnerable in her nakedness and surrendering posture.  (Art by Hallelujah Truth)

Hallelujah for TRANSFORMATION and...PLEASURE! Today I will combine the two prompts below and write about PLEASURABLE TRANSFORMATION and cultivating more of it!

REVERB15 (Day 14) Prompt: What has changed? You? The world? It can be a change that happened this past year or one you're looking toward in the time ahead. It can be a broad sweep obvious to all or a more subtle shift that only you know about. Tell us about transformation.

REVERB15 (Day 15) Prompt: What small pleasures gave you moments of intense joy in 2015? What more could you cultivate in 2016?

TRANSFORMATION. 
I danced TRANSFORMATION in 2015. Regularly, I danced with my "flaps up," opening my heart wide to the world and then danced with my "flaps down," embracing myself and my personal inner world. 

FLAPS UP! TRANSFORMATION. Here Hallelujah has gained some perspective on her Protector. Dance has propelled her into her own creative sphere. Now the Protector is forced to change. (Art by Hallelujah Truth)

While moving in dance, creating shapes, and holding stillness, I contemplated my "psychological" PROTECTOR, embodied HER, drew and painted HER, and TRANSFORMED both HER and another part of me, the ONE being PROTECTED.

This solo psychological dance and visual art PROTECTOR project  GREW and TRANSFORMED into a collaborative project with my friend, writer and dancer Lynn Hesse. She wrote a poem and created a dance about the archetypal mother and incorporating feminine animal images from my drawings and paintings. We named our performance piece, "Embody the Mother." (See this blog, BEGINNING THE DANCE: Embodying the Mother through performance with community as our witness)

Daily for several months, I painted 3 images a day on large newsprint paper after and inbetween dancing. Using brushes and then my fingers and the palms of my hands, I danced and painted my way to TRANSFORMATION. This process was immensely PLEASURABLE. I did it alone, then with my partner, and also within the structure of Fieldwork, refining our dance, poetry, and painting for performance with the observation of others. (See these blogs for those quickly painted images: here, here, and here.)

Through this CREATIVE process, I shifted psychologically in 2015. In InterPlay, we would say the shift occurred in my "bodyspirit," since we keep our body, mind, emotions, and spirit all together. My rather stern and restrictive PROTECTOR, softened, became malleable and let ME become MOTHER.

TRANSFORMATION AT THE CELLULAR LEVEL. A new dance has emerged. (Art by Hallelujah Truth)

Without more detail, this response to the REVERB prompts must sound rather vague and extraordinary. MOTHER SAYS, "That's okay. This is such an honest answer!" 

Cheers to LIFE's PLEASURES. May we all have the good fortune to TRANSFORM again and again.That's Coffee with Hallelujah! SOUL BLOG with me about your transformations and pleasures. Can you combine the two words and tell me about a PLEASURABLE TRANSFORMATION?

FIERCE MOTHER: Embodying an aspect of the archetypal feminine

FIERCE MOTHER. "If an alligator or crocodile has shown up, look for an opportunity to touch very primal energies. There is going to be an opportunity for strong birth and/or initiation that will open new knowledge and wisdom in some area of your life." --Ted Andrews in Animal Speak (image (c) by Hallelujah Truth

-->I am the fierce mother.

I am of everywhere and in everything.

I do not cover my head.

Or hide my tattoos or scars.

--Excerpt from “Embody the Mother” by Lynn Tharp Hesse

Hallelujah for the IMAGINATION! Hallelujah for COMPANIONSHIP and for COLLABORATION! Hallelujah for the playfulness of CREATING our realities through dance, poetry, and image.

Thus is the magic of the daily creative practice! In a month’s time or less, I have danced and painted almost every day as I collaborate with poet and dancer Lynn Hesse in Field to co-create the performance, “Embody the Mother.”  Here are the blog posts I have written about this collaboration and some of the visual images I have generated in the process:

March 26, 2015

SPRINGING INTO "Embodying the Mother" in collaboration with another who sees, hears, and meets me where I am

March 27, 2015

LISTENING TO THE WIND IN MY VEINS: Finding other places from which to speak and act

March 29, 2015

BEING A GENUINE CREATIVE FORCE: Dance the dance YOU dance!

April 6, 2015

BEGINNING THE DANCE: Embodying the Mother through performance with community as our witness  

This past Tuesday on April 21, was our last Field workshop before our formal presentation on Saturday, May 2, to another audience (with the Pine Lake Art Salon having been our first). I have loved the feedback from Field participants and the informal rehearsals Lynn and I have done together in our homes. Each of us has also practiced separately from one another—Lynn memorizing the lines from her poem and the steps of the dance that she choreographed and me painting three to four images each day speedily while dancing.

And when I wasn’t painting for my daily creative practice, I was drawing. Now, when I return to drawing, I discover that my drawing has changed. There is a greater fluency, the line feels happier to move into ideas, and I see a slight shift in imagery.

ALLIGATOR FORTUNE. Here I have drawn the MOTHER who does cover her head. Lynn Hesse's version has the Fierce Mother declare she does not cover her head. Four images of importance exist in this image: 1) Mother Mystery with the blue head covering 2) Fierce Mother Alligator 3) Hallelujah represented by the the diadem of three flowers 4) Wandjina, the Aboriginal Creation God representing my animus. I call this image, "Alligator Fortune" because I see that SHE has appeared in my life bringing courage for change. (image (c) by Hallelujah Truth)

In the past two days, the MOTHER has come to me in the form of the ALLIGATOR. I welcome this FIERCE MOTHER. Her lineage has survived 100 million years navigating both on land and in water. She is a symbol of the GREAT MOTHER and represents fertility and power. Alligator has been my totem for almost two decades, coming to me in dreams. (Here are some of my blog entries about the significance of alligators in my life: Alligator Dreaming, I’m a Little Body Spirit, Investigating Alligator Burrows.)

Just imagine what will emerge in the days to come! I will practice opening my arms to the GREAT MYSTERY, inviting the MOTHER to visit my images in whatever form she chooses to appear in. More shall be revealed—so stay tuned!

Meanwhile, that’s Coffee with Hallelujah! SOUL BLOG with me and share what you are learning in the process of your daily creative practice. What is one or more of your totems?

ALLIGATOR ENERGY. Mother Alligator emerged from greens and blues. (image (C) Hallelujah Truth.)

BEGINNING THE DANCE: Embodying the Mother through performance with community as our witness

PLAYING WITH THE MOTHER. On Easter Sunday 2015, Lynn Hesse and I had the wonderful opportunity to perform our work-in-progress, "Embody the Mother," at the Pine Lake Art Salon in Pine Lake, Georgia. (photo by Chiboodamoo, aka Tony Martin)

Hallelujah for the DANCE. Hallelujah for the OTHER. Hallelujah for all of the OTHERS--you, and you, and you--MY COMMUNITY--who bear witness and offer your diversity!

My life and art are transforming through the gorgeous entanglement of dance both sacred and playful and with another--Lynn Hesse! I am so grateful to Lynn for creating and holding the space for me to play, dance, and embody the mother with her.

BEGINNING THE DANCE. We begin our performance with me going onstage and painting. I begin with a ritual of lighting a candle and two InterPlay moves. Here my arms are open wide to experience the "big body" and spacious embrace of the great mystery of life. Before I begin painting, I also bow to the "little body," the finite me. (photo by Chiboodamoo, aka Tony Martin)

Yes! EMBODY THE MOTHER!

Collaboration with ANOTHER CREATIVE is supportive, comforting, engaging, expanding, challenging, and sacred.

What does that word mean--sacred?

WORDS FROM THE ARCHETYPAL MOTHER. My collaborator Lynn Hesse has adapted a poem of hers to merge with my images of THE MOTHER, both fierce and nurturing, both archetypal and real in addition to a choreographed sacred dance. (photos by Chiboodamoo, aka Tony Martin)

What is sacred?

I'm using the word to mean "spiritual," "holy," "blessed," "untouchable," and "protected." Sacred, for me, has the meaning of something that is respected and held with reverence.

Then, you might ask what are we doing, when Lynn and I say that we are creating a performance using elements of the SACRED?  We are creating a sacred dance (using dance phrases that embody the real and symbolic snake, the turtle, the eye, and the world), sacred practice (performing ritual--like lighting a candle and bowing--for example), and sacred friendship (one friend playing the role of the archetypal mother and the other being the novice daughter). 

How wondersome is it that we are collaborating with all of this use of SACRED so that I might "embody the mother" through our performance as we re-enact it over and over again throughout the upcoming months into August? On two more Tuesdays, we will repeat this ritual of embodying the mother at our Field Work and get feedback. There will be the rehearsals with Lynn and my solo painting each day as practice for being open to the archetypal mother through dance and thought.

Then we will perform for an audience again on the first Sunday of May for Field at Core Dance Studio in Decatur, Georgia, and again at the Decatur Arts Festival twice at the end of the month. We plan to take this performance to the Alternate Roots meeting in August if it is accepted.

I am grateful for the opportunity to transform through movement and thought. There is so much more to this story, but I will leave you with kisses and a warm embrace for now.

That's Coffee with Hallelujah. Soul Blog with me. What are you dancing with today? Is your dance transformational?

PAINTING AS PART OF THE PERFORMANCE.

DANCING AS PART OF THE PERFORMANCE, TOO.

CONNECTING WITH THE MOTHER.

THE CROWNING.

PLAYING MOMMY SAYS

GETTING AND RESPONDING TO FEEDBACK.

Acknowledgments: Great appreciation to Alice Teeter and Kathie DeNobriga for their dedication to the Pine Lake Art Salon that they have been conducting for 8 years! This performance on April 5, 2015 is the sixth time that I have had the good fortune to be a guest performer (Two times to lead a community HOWL and sell HOWL artwork; once to present this blog, Coffee With Hallelujah; another time to perform a two-voiced poem with my Chiboogamoo; and then to present the illustrations that I created for the children's book, The Misadventures of Maria the Hutia. Sincere thanks to my Chiboogamoo, aka Tony Martin, who documented this event with his amazing photos. Thank you!

LISTENING TO THE WIND IN MY VEINS: Finding other places from which to speak and act

"Forget about enlightenment.
Sit down wherever you are 
And listen to the wind singing in your veins."

-John Welwood

Hallelujah for listening to that force, that howling in my veins like March winds moving into April showers. Spring is here, and there is a shift in my BEING. 

I AM HERE.

GREEN HEART OF THE NOVICE. (image (c) Hallelujah Truth)

YES. 
HERE...

...Painting each day in a new way for me. My quest is to "Embody the Mother," for the performance I am collaborating on with Lynn Hesse.

I have acquired a very large pad of newsprint paper (24" x 36") and placed it on an easel. 

Instead of sitting hunched over a small tablet of paper with a micron pen or watercolor pencils, I am standing--no dancing-- while I paint with a dripping brush. 

For more than a year, I have been waiting for this moment of transformation when I would naturally move to another media, another size format, and another place from which to speak and act!
 
The drips running down this green Hallelujah image on the right were perceived by you visiting Pilgrims as tears. Tears? Movement creating flow. Can the drips be the wind in my veins? The bounce in my step? The desire for water to be water and to follow the pull of gravity?

Relinquishing all judgements, I embrace curiosity. Which images of THE MOTHER will appear and how? 

Right now, I am experimenting with both green and blue paint to "embody the Mother." I'm applying paint from a water jar with liquified acrylic, using tubed paint like a paste and applying it both with brush and fingers. 

My goal is to paint three images a day under ten minutes (because that is the length of our performance! Energetic music helps me express the "wind in my veins" and my dancing flows from that rhythm. I feel called to dance. Dancing becomes a necessity, a part of this creative act. 

Besides, I want these images embodying the mother to emerge from my body.

Oh I have my goals! My goals exist inside of the form I'm using to make these images, not the images themselves. The image making process--dancing to music and listening to my body--is my objective--to experience THE MOTHER physically. The images become the artifacts of the physical and spiritual experience!

CREATIVITY offers such a personal way to explore and listen to the HOWL!

As for ENLIGHTENMENT? Let's forget about it for now. I want to be HERE inside of the PLAY. Just this morning, Lynn Hesse and I received the good news  that we will be performing "Embody the Mother" as part of the Decatur Arts Festival at the end of May.

That's Coffee With Hallelujah. Soul Blog with me and tell me what is howling in your veins right now. What is departing with March winds? What is arriving with April showers?

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS: I am so appreciative to Mark Nepo and his reflections in The Book of Awakening for its rich thoughts and quotations from others like John Welwood. Thanks to Cynthia Winton-Henry, co-founder of InterPlay, who suggested I try making art as part of a performance because this improvisational way of being is very energizing! And Lynn Hesse! Oh my! What a journey we are on--THANK YOU!
 

SPRINGING INTO "Embodying the Mother" in collaboration with another who sees, hears, and meets me where I am

THE NOVICE PILGRIM. (image (c) by Hallelujah Truth)

Hallelujah for the CREATIVE PROCESS! Hallelujah for being open to NEW ways of BEING! And Hallelujah to COLLABORATION with others on this miraculous journey!

2015 is such a rich and full year expanding out into SPRING right now. I find myself so thankful for having the opportunity to explore my SOUL through dance, word, image, and friendship. 

On the last Tuesday in February, I took in a deep breath, signed up, and attended my first session for Fieldwork--a forum for artists (originating in NYC) to test their ideas over a ten-week period, gain insights from feedback, and craft a performable event. 

FIELD IN PROGRESS. At the conclusion of our performance on Tuesday, March 24, in Fieldwork at Core in Decatur, Georgia, we got feedback. Lynn Hess is on the far right. I'm the one taking the photo. My art is displayed on the easel, chairs and next to Lynn. My performance includes making art in front of an audience as an avenue to "embody the mother." (photo by me, Hallelujah Truth)

But I was not alone nor did I find this pathway by myself! Creative Pilgrims! WE ARE NOT ALONE! There are others who SEE us, HEAR us, and MEET us where we are. Lynn Hesse is one of those people! 

A year ago SPRING, I supported her Fieldwork piece, "Love in Full Life and Length," (see my blog about this experience) as a guest artist using the InterPlay form of telling a side-by-side story. This SPRING, Lynn heard and answered my yearnings to collaborate on a performance to "embody the mother."

THE MOTHER AND SACRED BLUE (image (c)by Hallelujah Truth)

We have been in process of creating "Embody the Mother" now for six weeks. With Lynn as a word artist and me as a visual artist, we use a third element of dance to connect us. 

UNCOILING MOTHER. (image (c) by Hallelujah Truth)

Oh! What discoveries we are making together about our own CREATIVITY, process, collaboration, and responding to feedback. And, Lynn, well she is a seasoned performer, and she is SHOWING ME THE WAY. 

Thank you Lynn for the depth, height, passion and resourcefulness of your kind, kind SOUL! 

CREATIVE PILGRIMS! You are invited to stay tuned for updates about our performance piece as we present it to different audiences over time. Our first trial will be at the Pine Lake Art Salon in Pine Lake, Georgia, which is well known for its gentle reception and helpful feedback.


That's Coffee with Hallelujah! SOUL BLOG with me about your way of BEING and what NEW pathways you might travel!

HALLELUJAH YOUR TRUTH as it uncoils!

Some Good Sacred Memory Is a Saving Grace: Using InterPlay to collaborate, dance, heal

SISTERS, DREAMS, DANCE. These sisters, Hazel and Stella, participated with me in Lynn Hesse's performance piece, "Love in Full Life and Length." Wasn't the Sears catalog a source of some of our dreams for those of us who grew up in the 1950's and 1960's? (photo by Hallelujah Truth)

Hallelujah for one good memory, for it is a saving grace! Hallelujah for sacred memories preserved from childhood. Hallelujah for creating and co-creating with others in community and healing through the creative arts! 

More than a year ago, I began my journey with InterPlay, and as "way leads on to way," I have found that major life paths have diverged and I am traveling a road "less traveled." On this journey, I have made new friends, and one of them a dancer, Lynn Hesse, invited me to perform in a "piece" of a larger body of her ongoing work.  I said, "Yes"! And it is making all the difference.

DANCING IN MEMORY OF HER FATHER-DAUGHTER RELATIONSHIP. Lynn Hesse warms up for "The Field" rehearsal of her piece, "Love in Full Life and Length," at Core, a dance studio in Decatur, Georgia. A critique followed our performance resulting in significant changes in the presentation of our content.  (photo by Hallelujah Truth)

Last night, we performed our piece that Lynn has titled "Love in Full Life and Length." Our performance took place as part of something called "The Field," a format in which artists workshop their ideas and get critiques. My role with Lynn lasted 4-to-5 short minutes, but we spent more than 15 hours developing it using a form from InterPlay called "Side-by-Side Story." 

Our challenge was rehearsing shared memories about our fathers inside the "Side-by-Side Story," which is an improvisational form and supporting Lynn's 4-minute dance piece on behalf of her father. We had even "performed" our side-by-side stories twice in front of an audience, once for Asheville InterPlay in North Carolina and once for a "Fieldwork" critique in Decatur, Georgia. Our expressed memories preserved from our childhoods have evolved after each rehearsal and performance. What a "saving grace" dance is!

SISTERS IN SPIRIT AND DANCE. Lynn and I posed for a photo before our performance at Core. As you can see the younger of the two sisters photo-bombed us.  (photo by one of the sisters, Hazel and Stella)

What is the "saving grace" from these memories contextualized in the full length of our lives? Taking negative and positive memories--words--and embodying them in dance, play, and story (mine and Lynn's), consolidates, expresses, and transports them. Our mixed bag of childhood memories have transformed like caged white doves being released into the azure blue heavens, flapping their wings and crying joyously.

Last night's performance held at Emory University's Dance Studio at the Schwartz Center for the Performing Arts challenged me. I still feel that talking about my family, my father is a private affair. How can I tote out the painful memories and wounds to a wider public than my family and friends? We had a full audience!

TECHNICAL DETAILS. Lynn observes as the Tech Support guy marks the floor to insure that the blanket for the two sisters would be placed correctly for the performance. We also chose lighting and practiced getting on and off stage--and yes, bowing! (photo by Hallelujah Truth)

But working on this performance "Love in Full Life and Length" has made my experiences clearer to me. The immense complexity of LOVE is beguiling. The legacy our fathers gave us is, in part, what their fathers and mothers gave them. My father did his best for me all the while dealing with his wounds from his childhood, the Korean Conflict, Vietnam War, and disappointing outcome of  a promising military career. Are a father's wounds, his daughter's wounds? My answer is a resounding "Yes." But I believe in the possibility of healing my wounds and in his too, even though he died 10 years ago. How?

Dancing on behalf of my father-daughter relationship repeatedly! 
 

GREEN ROOM EXPERIENCE. Emory Dance Director and Associate Professor Lori Teague (far right) prepares us for the beginning of the Fieldwork Showcase. It was very exciting to see performers warming up, eating, and communing! I sat quietly and went over the words I needed to say at the very beginning: "People talk a great deal about your education. But some good sacred memory from childhood, well perhaps that's the BEST education." (photo by Hallelujah Truth)

Dancing some of the good sacred memories repeatedly in developing material for our performance has already changed who I am in relation to my father and the rest of my life. Through movement and "re-storying" my past experiences, I have started to comprehend the love, courage, and good that my father gave me. I am now beginning to embody the many good sacred father memories while honoring his wounded body and soul. 

When I move in this father-daughter dance,  I also honor my childhood and the woman I am now. Performing "Love in Full Life and Length" with Lynn has been such an awesome odyssey. What a privilege to dance with another daughter in honor of our fathers,  ourselves, and love. I believe that we can heal our wounds.

FIELDWORK CRITIQUE. Post performance, members of "The Field" sit in front of audience members and other performers for a critique. Here Lynn Hesse is listening to a fellow "Fielder" on how he appreciated our side-by-side story! (photo by Hallelujah Truth)

Sisters/Daughters through Dance

That's Coffee With Hallelujah. SOUL BLOG with me and tell me what is that one good memory you have that is a saving grace. How will you honor that memory? A dance? A poem? A picture?

ACKNOWLEDGMENT: I acknowledge Lynn Hesse for her depth of spirit and how she goes about crafting her work. Although I was a novice performer, she invited me to co-create with her. During our collaboration, I was struck by her dedication and persistence. At the age of 61, she is a graceful dancer, one who expresses her ideas in choreographed poetry. Thank you Lynn for your loving guidance and nurturing spirit. It was an honor to create and perform our father-daughter dances together. Thank you for the healing that has begun as a result of it. You are my Sister now!