In response to the Reverb10 prompt for today, Hallelujah is evaluating how to eliminate 11 unneeded and uninvited SABOTEURS of her CREATIVE SPIRIT for 2011.Since these saboteurs, which I call my “fallen angels,” are close acquaintances of mine, I know them by name. Let me introduce you to a few salient features of their killing natures and tell you my plan for ridding my life of them:
#1 DOUBTING THOMASINA—I would like to eliminate the sweet voice of DOUBTING THOMASINA, who dresses in a red-hot tutu and pirouettes while whispering in an embarrassing manner questions like, “Is this really good enough?” and “Don’t you think you need more experience to do this?” ELIMINATION TECHNIQUE: Duck tape her mouth closed.
#2 FAILURE PREDICTOR—Who invited “Mr. Judicious” to my home and heart anyway? Clothed in long black robes with a devil tail sticking out of it and sporting a long white wig, he attempts to warn of the negative consequences of ANY action I might take—“It will not succeed,” he utters, lowering his head and nodding from side to side with great concern. ELIMINATION TECHNIQUE: Disrobe him and reveal his chicken legs. Cook him for dinner.
#3 DREAM ASSASINATOR—This fallen angel, an expert archer, is swathed with 2 or 3 quivers filled with poison arrows. I am the bulls-eye of his target practice. He pierces each dream as if it were an apple sitting atop my head! ELIMINATION TECHNIQUE: Snip the string on his bow.
#4 LAZY BONES—Miss LAZY BONES, if she has any skeletal structure at all, never leaves the red velvet couch in front of the Lake of Contemplation. “You can exercise tomorrow,” she sighs. ELIMINATION TECHNIQUE: Set her couch on fire.
#5 LOVE TREPIDATOR—Multiple broken bones mending in various casts cause the LOVE TREPIDATOR to be immobile. “Loving others causes REAL damage,” he explains. “Best not to LOVE. No one can be trusted.” ELIMINATION TECHNIQUE: Clip off the casts to show healed bones ready for tennis or horseback riding lessons.
#6 CREATIVITY BRAKES—Yelling “STOP,” this tan fallen angel, clad in a moo-moo and flip-flops, comes equipped with a hula hoop! Seductively, she me pulls into the circle of her hula and attempts to engage me in a repetitive circular dance, from which there is no release! Over and over again, we DO the SAME thing! ELIMINATION TECHNIQUE: Exclaim that her “hula hoop” is really just a beautiful hologram—an illusion, that’s all. Step away!
#7 QUIBBLER—Looking like anyone’s little sister, Quibbler wants to discuss the appropriate use of acrylics, and then move on to debate the absence of perspective and light in my painting. She delights in evading the important issues of MY HEART and VISION by focusing on trivial matters such as technique! ELIMINATION TECHNIQUE: Take that old cardboard refrigerator box and put it over her. Turn her into a robot which loves to clean paintbrushes and clean up my work space.
#8 WELL-MEANING REPAIRMAN—I really want to give up this stumbling, bumbling well-intending fallen angel! The REPAIRMEN, insists on “fixing” things that can’t and won’t EVER be whole again. Hasn’t he heard of Humpty-Dumpty? “Keep trying,” he pleads. “It will eventually work again….” ELIMINATION TECHNIQUE: Find him a girlfriend, who loves him as he is. He will put up a sign, “NO REPAIRS NECESSARY—GONE ON VACATION, PERMANENTLY.”
#9 UNINITIATED NOVICE—Of course the lack of BEING initiated into the “secrets” of being a SUCCESSFUL CREATIVE makes this fallen angel completely GREEN in appearance. “I’m just a beginner,” she says humbly. “Who me?” she queries. “I’m not THERE yet.” Wherever there is! ELIMINATION TECHNIQUE: Hold a secret ceremony to welcome the NOVICE into the REALM OF EXPERIENCE. It will involve black licorice and gardenias.
#10 UNILATERALIST—This political fallen angel advocates one-sided creative action. Running around like Henny Penny warning everyone that disaster is imminent because the sky is falling, the UNILATERALIST sees only ONE WAY to DO things. ELIMINATION TECHNIQUE: Throw an elaborate party with the theme song, “The SKY is FALLING” and have all the party goers dance together jubilantly catching the sky repeatedly—each time differently.
#11 MANIFESTATION DISBELIEVER—A wolf disguised in Red Riding Hood’s cape, this fallen angel leads you into the dark enchanted forest and EATS YOU ALIVE. His message is the opposite of dream fulfillment--he proclaims that the unknown is frightening and ultimately fatal. ELIMINATION TECHNIQUE: Have him get audited. He’ll never leave his den again.
RESULTS: How will my life be different because of the elimination of these 11 killing saboteurs? First, I must engage in outright war. I suspect I will learn a lot, gain momentum in my creativity and make new friends along the way! This PURSUIT gives my life meaning.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS: I would like to thank REVERB10 for giving me the chance to think about my saboteurs. I wouldn’t have been able to name them without the help of Lesly Fredman, CREATIVITY COACH extraordinaire, who has been asking me to name my saboteurs. Thanks go to my Chiboogamoo who listened to my ideas this morning as I composed December 11’s response (Check out his blog entry on Australian paleontology that he has been writing this morning.)
REQUEST: Gentle Reader, can you share your SABOTEURS with me? How will you manage them? Hallelujah wants to learn about you!